It's really this simple. A true bar has none of these three things.
No webcam.
No karaoke.
No blender.
Yes, read that list and commit it to memory.
That's not to say that some good places might not have one (but not two!) of those things; however, it will never achieve greatness as a bar, only as a "nightspot" or "club." [Note: No Members Only attire allowed.]
Meanwhile, today's paper is full of all sorts of nonsense. Apparently, there's a pot bar in Portland, Oregon, where so-called "medical marijuana" treatments are prescribed AND they have karaoke. http://www.sacbee.com/2011/05/17/3632337/free-weed-free-tunes-ore-pot-bar.html Not enough ganja in the world to get me to listen or to perform. [Note: Change the entertainment to "Smokeyokey." Cough!]
And then there's the story of the Panera Bread joint (yes, pun intended) in Missoura (yes, spelled like it's pronounced) where customers only pay what they want. http://www.usatoday.com/money/industries/food/2011-05-16-panera-pay-what-you-can_n.htm?csp=hf WOW! This is chew-and-screw taken to the extreme! But I would prefer to see a bar run in this same manner. C'mon, Squire, your $3 price is too high on a goddam PBR pounder! It's only $2.50 (and STILL too high) at the Hot Stove. And the same price will get you another 4oz on tap at Planck's. So, let us pay what we think it's worth. You'll still make a dandy profit . . . even if YOU were paying RETAIL for the same goddam can. (But you're paying wholesale.) Plus tip for popping that top. Let's face it, anyone who pays $3 for a can (an CAN) of PBR is someone trying to impress us with the fact that s/he's willing to piss away the dough on a simple beer. They would NEVER drink it if it cost them less. Go figure, but don't be impressed.
Finally, what's the attraction of Dancing with the Stars? Tom Bergeron? Good grief. Kirstie Alley (who ran that Boston bar into the ground)? If it's such an attraction, when is some desperate bar going to have Danceoke? You know, get drunk and try to dance for entertainment and for scoring. Oh, wait, they used to do that at the Compass Lounge, didn't they? Everything old is new again. We'll call it Dancing in the Bars.
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